Good Bye Sachin Tendulkar

The one thing that all of us can agree on is that there will never be another phenomenon in our lifetime like Sachin Tendulkar. News of his retirement came in early and frankly it didn’t really make an impact at first.The slow motion movie started in 2011 with his labored gasp to a hundred international tons, eventual retirement from ODIs and the IPL with it now culminating in his retirement from tests after playing number 200. For a man that has consistently said that 100 is just a number, this seems a little hypocritical. But we understand that the modest little man must have bowed to pressure from the BCCI and others to delay his announcement until he got to the milestone. Nothing else explains the haste with which the West Indies tour was arranged and the crisis with CSA begun.

I guess that’s what we have criticized him about all these years. Not willing to stand up and be counted. Indian cricket is reeling from scandals and poor leadership. Unfortunately, the colossus that he is on the field, he is a mere aam aadmi  off it. The Rajya Sabha membership was probably a well –thought out way for him to speak out without fear of a BCCI backlash or to offer up ideas to clean up sports in general. This dream that we have of Sachin will probably remain unfulfilled.

However, many other dreams that we dreamt were fulfilled. Those of us who saw him early in his career feel he has underachieved. Yes, that’s right. Underachieved! But this rancor is misplaced perhaps. It only masks the disappointment of a generation of us who lived through regular humiliations meted out to Indian teams by Pakistan, West Indies, Australia, England and Sri Lanka. Throughout the nineties India really didn’t overcome those teams with any confidence despite Tendulkar’s frequent heroics. He gave us hope that we lacked in the decade before that. 

His biggest contribution actually came in the 2000s with the advent of the new generation of cricketers starting with Virender Sehwag. A self-confessed emulator of Sachin Tendulkar, he epitomized the new kids who knew no fear. Dhoni, Yuvraj, Kohli, Gambhir and now Shikar Dhawan have followed this legion of kids who worshipped at the Tendulkar school of batsmanship. Fearless expression of talent! Unfortunately, the master himself became tempered and measured and a grim accumulator. Perhaps it was a response to age and the scarring suffered by being part of losing teams in the nineties.

Dravid and Laxman may have been better test batsmen when it counted. Ganguly may have been a better captain. Dhoni will be the most accomplished Indian captain and ODI cricketer when he retires. Sehwag will be the only one with two test triples for India. But the GOD of Indian cricket, the father of Indian batting expression will always be Sachin Tendulkar. Though he himself probably never overcame the nerves of a pressure-filled chase except on a few occasions, it’s clear that it’s his spirit that gives Kohli the temperament in an ODI chase. It’s his technique and discipline that fuels Cheteshwar Pujara’s desire to excel. It’s his entertaining shot-making that propels Yuvraj Singh. It’s his ability to stand-up to fast bowling that drove Sehwag. And it’s his wisdom that has built an Indian cricket team today that we are proud of.

The shot that really rang out for us was THAT six of Shoaib Akhtar in the 2003 World Cup. With that one shot, Tendulkar exorcised the ghosts of eighties and nineties forever. Indian batsmen had now stepped out of the stereotype of talented spinelessness. And the credit goes to one man and one man alone. Sachin Tendulkar. It’s time for him to let his baby go. It had already grown up when it won the 2011 World Cup. Good bye Sachin!

Good Bye Sachin Tendulkar

The one thing that all of us can agree on is that there will never be another phenomenon in our lifetime like Sachin Tendulkar. News of his retirement came in early and frankly it didn’t really make an impact at first.The slow motion movie started in 2011 with his labored gasp to a hundred international tons, eventual retirement from ODIs and the IPL with it now culminating in his retirement from tests after playing number 200. For a man that has consistently said that 100 is just a number, this seems a little hypocritical. But we understand that the modest little man must have bowed to pressure from the BCCI and others to delay his announcement until he got to the milestone. Nothing else explains the haste with which the West Indies tour was arranged and the crisis with CSA begun.

I guess that’s what we have criticized him about all these years. Not willing to stand up and be counted. Indian cricket is reeling from scandals and poor leadership. Unfortunately, the colossus that he is on the field, he is a mere aam aadmi  off it. The Rajya Sabha membership was probably a well –thought out way for him to speak out without fear of a BCCI backlash or to offer up ideas to clean up sports in general. This dream that we have of Sachin will probably remain unfulfilled.

However, many other dreams that we dreamt were fulfilled. Those of us who saw him early in his career feel he has underachieved. Yes, that’s right. Underachieved! But this rancor is misplaced perhaps. It only masks the disappointment of a generation of us who lived through regular humiliations meted out to Indian teams by Pakistan, West Indies, Australia, England and Sri Lanka. Throughout the nineties India really didn’t overcome those teams with any confidence despite Tendulkar’s frequent heroics. He gave us hope that we lacked in the decade before that. 

His biggest contribution actually came in the 2000s with the advent of the new generation of cricketers starting with Virender Sehwag. A self-confessed emulator of Sachin Tendulkar, he epitomized the new kids who knew no fear. Dhoni, Yuvraj, Kohli, Gambhir and now Shikar Dhawan have followed this legion of kids who worshipped at the Tendulkar school of batsmanship. Fearless expression of talent! Unfortunately, the master himself became tempered and measured and a grim accumulator. Perhaps it was a response to age and the scarring suffered by being part of losing teams in the nineties.

Dravid and Laxman may have been better test batsmen when it counted. Ganguly may have been a better captain. Dhoni will be the most accomplished Indian captain and ODI cricketer when he retires. Sehwag will be the only one with two test triples for India. But the GOD of Indian cricket, the father of Indian batting expression will always be Sachin Tendulkar. Though he himself probably never overcame the nerves of a pressure-filled chase except on a few occasions, it’s clear that it’s his spirit that gives Kohli the temperament in an ODI chase. It’s his technique and discipline that fuels Cheteshwar Pujara’s desire to excel. It’s his entertaining shot-making that propels Yuvraj Singh. It’s his ability to stand-up to fast bowling that drove Sehwag. And it’s his wisdom that has built an Indian cricket team today that we are proud of.

The shot that really rang out for us was THAT six of Shoaib Akhtar in the 2003 World Cup. With that one shot, Tendulkar exorcised the ghosts of eighties and nineties forever. Indian batsmen had now stepped out of the stereotype of talented spinelessness. And the credit goes to one man and one man alone. Sachin Tendulkar. It’s time for him to let his baby go. It had already grown up when it won the 2011 World Cup. Good bye Sachin!

To wait or not to wait

So when you feel that something/someone is just right and pray fervently to god for that to happen, should you go about taking steps to try and make it happen or should you wait for that sign from the universe and see if it will take its own course.

Say you come across someone who you think is perfect for you. Should you go ahead and express your feelings or wait for him to start feeling similarly for you? What if you have never met that person and have known for less than a month? Do you trust your instincts and feel right about it? Or should you be apprehensive in trusting your own heart?

How much longer should you know the person to know that person well enough? My parents still don't know me well enough. Hell, even I don't know myself well enough. Is this criteria even valid before you decide that someone is The One?

I don't know. I'm tired of misreading the signs universe has been sending me. What if this is again one of those times?

For a change, I'd like a clear answer, not signs.

Men don't take much time while bathing because a slight delay to come out of the bathroom than usual and bathing is called masturbation.

Men don't take much time while bathing because a slight delay to come out of the bathroom than usual and bathing is called masturbation.

Date a girl who tweets.  Date a girl who spends her time tweeting instead of meeting people.  She has a problem with poor internet connectivity.  Date a girl who has a list of people she likes to stalk on Twitter.

Find a girl who tweets.  You'll know because she has a smile on her face as she looks into her laptop.  She will be the one frantically pulling down to refresh, the phone, also called Tweeting Device.  You see the weird chick clicking pictures of books in a book shop? Twitpic or it didn't happen.  They can never resist the urge to let the world know they're reading.

She's the girl waiting in that coffee shop, clicking picture of the heart on froth of your cappuccino.  If you take a peek at her mug, she would have thrown the spoon and sugar sachets messily to add character to the picture.  She might glare at you if you interrupt her as she checks in on Foursquare, as most girls who check in on Foursquare do.  Ask her, CCD or Filter Kaapi, #youprefer?

It's easy to date a girl who tweets.  Compliment on her change of display picture, and favourite her tweets.  Give her the gifts of retweets.  Give her #FFs, RT and ♥ ♥ ♥.   Let her know that you understand the importance of stalking.  Understand that she knows the difference between tweets and real life, but by god, she's going to make her life like around Twitter(as soon as Twitter gives option to archive your tweets).

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her.  Call her celebrity once in a while, and name her in "must follow" lists in magazines and newspapers.  It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who tweets knows that boring tweets will lead to people unfollowing her.  Because a girl who tweets knows that things come to and end, and will unfollow you eventually. That you can always follow back again. Through another id. And troll.  That Twitter is meant to have a troll or two.
  If you find a girl who tweets, keep her close. Her sentences will be of 140 characters.  When you find her awake at 2 am, tweeting away to glory, threaten her to disconnect her internet connection.  You may lose her for a couple of hours, but she will thank you when she rediscovers life.  She'll talk like the people she follows on Twitter are around her, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a Tweetup.  Or during an NH7 Weekender.  Or Metallica concert.  Or very casually next time she's sick.  Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn't burst and bled all over your chest yet.  You will live tweet the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the internet memes and kitteh gifs, maybe on the same day.  You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will tell you the trending topics under her breath while you think of a witty pun.

Date a girl who tweets, because you deserve it.  You deserve the girl who can give you the most colourful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half baked proposals, then you're better off without her. If you want the world and a parallel universe, date a girl who tweets.

Or better.  Stay #ForeverAlone.